Ever Google an old boyfriend?

Everybody does it, and most of the time its harmless. Youre sitting at your computer, and old whats-his-name pops into your head. You wonder what hes up to and type his name into Google. Sometimes you find out. Sometimes you dont.

But Googling an old boyfriend (the one who got away, for example) can become dangerous, especially if it becomes an obsession. Its one thing to find out, say, that hes recently been promoted to Executive VP at Trump International, or to briefly check out his kids Communion photos on his family website. Its quite another if you find yourself hitting his website day after day, or Googling him continually in the hopes of scratching up fresh information.

One woman told me shes gone even further. Im computer savvy and can get information on anyone, she said. Shes a young, beautiful, and obviously intelligent person whos digging up information on a guy she once worked with and his current girlfriend. She pored over photos of the girlfriend, comparing herself to her, before figuring out a way to delete the pictures from the guys website. She also managed to hack into his friends email accounts and reads their messages to further keep tabs on him.

Theres a name for this behavior. Its called cyberstalking. Heres the sad thing: If the guy were to ever find out what this woman is up to, hed lose respect for her. The discovery would annihilate the slim chance shed ever win him. And he might even be sufficiently creeped out to notify the police.

Google doesnt have to be a womans downfall if she uses it wisely. Its fun to Google an old boyfriend, even if the relationship ended badly and you never want to lay eyes on him again. Its also a good way to learn how to contact a guy you once liked for another shot at romance. Its possible youll find out hes single and available. If you do, email the guy once, casually, and briefly. Wait for him to respond.

If he does, great. If he doesnt, forget him.

Take the hint. Cease Googling him immediately and never send him another emailever! He is clearly not meant for you. Understand that this could be a very good thing; too many women are trapped in relationships with the wrong guy, and somebody upstairs may be looking out for you.

Heres a tip: If you find yourself typing a guys name into a search engine more than once a week, you may be becoming obsessed. Stop yourself while you still can.

Cyberstalking is dangerous. Its also highly unattractive.

Put yourself in the other persons place: How would you feel if you found out a guy was repeatedly Googling you? If you found out he was hitting your website after breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Hacking into your friends email accounts?

Would that turn you on or off?

Behave accordingly.