Do you have any romantic regrets? As a dating coach, I often hear stories about the "one that got away." Some people can spend a lifetime wondering what would have happened if they had only acted differently. One woman reminisced about a guy she met right before she went on a month-long vacation with her parents to Hawaii. She was crazy about him and she felt they had a spark. She could not wait to see him again. He was all she thought about while she was gone. However, by the time she got back, he had gone on a blind date with someone and had become involved. There are many other regrets people share about dating that cannot be undone. However, if you are single and looking, here are some lessons you can learn from their mistakes: * Dating someone for the wrong reason Fear of being alone is usually the reason for this choice. People would rather go out with someone rather than not go out at all. You can get stuck on the idea that you will never find anyone. But if you develop your confidence, you may realize that there are a lot of wonderful single men and women out there. * Missed opportunities How many times did you notice someone interesting but walked away without saying anything? Chances are, they might have been interested in you too but thought you didn't care because you didn't speak to them. Sometimes, you have a short moment in time to seize an opportunity. You need to step up and introduce yourself. If you can get over the notion that you might be "rejected" you have nothing to lose. If someone isn't friendly, breeze on by and talk to someone else. * Working all the time There is a fine line between being responsible and doing a good job and working all the time to the point where you don't have a life. Seek the balance knowing that there will be times when you will work long hours if you are in the middle of a project, but sooner or later, you will take time to rest, date, and renew yourself. Working all the time can leave little room for romance. * Saying thoughtless things Unkind words can kill a relationship. In the blink of an eye, put-down humor can stop sounding funny and start to sound mean. Pay attention to what people are sensitive to (usually their weight, how they look, their background, or their age) and be attuned to comments that could be taken the wrong way. * Communication This is probably the worst dating regret that exists. Because of immaturity, inexperience, fear, or lack of clarity, everyone at some point in their lives has had a moment when they regret what they said--or what they did not say. If you wait for the person you meet to say how he or she feels first, you may drift apart, not knowing there was the potential for a relationship. At the other end of the spectrum, if you profess your feelings of love too soon, the person you are dating may think you are desperate. No one is perfect and everyone has had dating experiences that they would like to forget. Minimize your romantic regrets by remembering some of the above. |
